Ok, so this is a few days late as I was having major computer problems (which I won't bore you with). I made a few notes on what I did on Sunday but I didn't for Monday or Tuesday. Either way whatever I write will be coloured by how I feel now rather than how I did at the time, however much I try to be faithful to what my instant reactions were then.

Sunday:

I went to the gym. It is small with just a few running machines and bicycles, an ab machine, a lat pull down/seated row machine and a leg curl and extension machine. I was very pleased to complete my run really easily even though it was the next step up in training. Then I realised I hadn't of course just done a session on the rower which I normally do first. Then the ab machine - but I think I'll just do cruches in the hotel room in the future as I think thats more worthwhile. The lat pull down and seated row with weights (slightly ow but ok). I then did leg curl and extension which was a real killer, particularly extension. But I pushed myself as I really want to gym it this month. The gym was all to myself which was really nice. I didn't always see how to adjust the machines and in one case was just embarassingly too feek and weeble to do it. It was quite funny watching the gym attendent keep an eye on me without being too obvious as if he was staring at me work out, but always come to my aid when needed. He was very serious and professional. I gave him such a big smile and thank you at the end that he seemed to relax, gave me an apple and suggested I use the women's steam room. Oh what bliss! The steam seemed much cooler the usual - but I guess there is less of a temperature difference than normal.

So far emotionally I have been ok. Not nearly as pained as I thought I may be. I think it is because I am basically totally and utterly in love and also have the absolute knowledge that I am loved absolutely. It gives me enormous confidence and ironically it is this confidence that allows me to be away from my love for such a long time. I think if there was any hint of a doubt I wouldn't be able to go away.

There has been one thing that has got to me and that is eating alone in the evening. However busy Sat and I get, with often one or other of us out in the evening, we make a point of having a meal together. I really miss that. It was funny, there were a few people eating alone in the hotel restaurant and I noticed they all chose seats facing into the restaurant (including me). I guess fundamentally we all have an instinct for human contact. I chose Sea Bass on a bed of spinach, mushrooms and a few tiny new potatos, as it was something that Sat might have cooked. Sat - they poured soy sauce over it which I first thought was odd but it actually really worked. Perhaps you would like to try it?